Waiting

 Over the years, 

I have come to 

realise that I'm not 

good at waiting.

I am an expert 

at giving up instead.

So let me do just that.

What can be worse?

The worst thing about giving up

is to pretend that you have made

the right decision.

By leaving what you defined

as 'toxic'.

But I mean well

Some people assume that just because

they mean well, they can never hurt anyone.

That is selfish. 

If you really care, what they feel is more important

than what you think.

But truth is, you don't care about them but only yourself.

You don't wanna their feelings in your conscience,

So, you say "but, I mean well"

lol, fuck off

Anyone there?

I know I'm not alone.

I know there are those who care.

They'd want to be there when I'm in pain.

They'd want to catch me when I fall.

They'd listen to me if I open up.

But, is it my fault that I just feel really lonely now?

Addiction

It's scary how addictive can giving up be,

Once you gave up on something,

You'll keep on doing it.

You keep on telling yourself to stop.

Don't go further.

It's hurting you.

So you should stop.

It's not going to work.

Just stop.

At first, it takes courage.

But now, it's taking you away.

You're addicted to it.

Stop

Fake it till you make it.

I was never honest with my feelings.

I was never taught to be.

They told me, I shouldn't cry.

Cry is for the weak and I should be strong.

They told me not to smile that much,

they'll think you're nice and

they'll take advantage of you.

They told me to never embrace my emotions

and decide everything using my head, rationally.

But now they say I'm heartless, cold and expressionless.

Who's fault is that?

Why is it mine?

Make what, really?

Why we give up?

I came to realise that

people don't simply give up 

because it's hard.

But they do

simply because

it is not worth it.

And worth is subjective.

When something is subjective,

there is no right or wrong.

But there is a reason.

Thank you for 

inspiring me

Sofa

I momentarily thought

That you belong in my comfort zone

The sofa I'm sitting on

Cause you have been sitting on it

for quite long.

Looking belonged. 

But you don't belong here.

You were never supposed to sit here.

That's why you eventually 

stood up and leave.

Gladly now, after a long time,

I get to stretch my legs

on this sofa of mine.