Wednesday 31 March 2010

Truth is killing me

Yes2. I'm not going. and i'm trying to be strong. but somehow, i just can't forget this phrase


"Seri, takpe eh, awak kasi peluang pada orang lain?"


boleh. kalau begitulah keadilan diletakkan saya terima dengan hati yang terbuka. namun, saya tetap manusia biasa. Perasaan terkilan selepas 6 yang diharungi, pasti akan wujud. Mustahil kalau tidak menangis. I'm still trying to be strong. Life is hard sometimes like what i've said at the post before. To both of you, i will give my all for you guys to make it. I just need some times. I'm not that strong. Mom and dad came here tadi, and now they have realised that their "kegemilangan yang diharapkan" are not that strong. yes. i can cry out loud and tell the whole world abt it but i can't change the fate,the decision. and i am very please to hear this from my dad.


"You are still our daughter no matter what and we are still proud of you. we will be prouder if you can show us that you're strong"


selepas 6, selepas dua kali di posisi tersebut, akhirnya aku tumpas dengan diri sendiri. Ya Allah, pasti ada hikmah atas segalanya. Berkatilah hidupku. Sekarang aku faham apa maksud cikgu menceritakan tentang anak bongsunya sebanyak dua kali kepadaku.

"Ibu, Allah bagi ujian itu sebab Dia sayang kita kan?"

Malu pada diri sendiri apabila kanak2 berumur 8 tahun mampu menerima segala takdir dengan senyuman.


alhamdulillah~

Monday 29 March 2010

i want someone to hear me.

Life is fun. Life is tough. Life is colorful. Life
is cruel. Life is meanless. Life is fool.


Nothing makes sense, nothing makes sense anymore.
Nothing is right, nothing is right when your gone.
I'm losing my breath, I'm losing my right to be wrong
I'm frightened to death, I'm frightened that I won't be strong,


I want someone to love me
For who I am
I want someone to need me
Is that so bad?
I wanna break all the madness
But it's all I have
I want someone to love me
For who I am


I'm shaking it off, I'm shaking off all of the pain.
You're breaking my heart, breaking my heart once again

yes2. life can't never be perfect. but, that is the whole point of life anyways. to make us realise that we have to struggle really hard to achieve what we wanted. maybe this is kinda lame but yes, life is like a wheel. sometimes, we're going to be on the top sometimes we're going to be at the bottom of life.


what am i going to share is, my life was really tough right now. i'm losing control cause i don't have someone to catch me if i fall. i just wanna be strong. but i'm not. at certain things i can pretend that evertthing will be alright. but, when it comes to family, it is really hard to say. after getting the 3rd place for cheerleading, we've lost at semi final and getting the worst result ever(which i wish it is just a dream). and now, i don't think that i'm going to uia and my parents just busy esp abah with his works. or should i say he is really concern in getting all his jobs done. and my mom is trying to support him a lot. i am left alone. sometimes, i think that i have to be strong just like aliah, she can let her father to move to Qatar this year. i've cried when i hear the whole story. but, yes i am not strong like what you guys think.i suck. all i want right now is someone to hear me and support.
p/s:135/160 is a nightmare!

Tuesday 23 March 2010

Stupid

maybe the title is a lil bit harsh. but i don't care.

zon tengah debat-kalah at semi final with smap kajang
cheerleading-number 3
examination results-really terok!


that is why i'm saying my life is stupid. there's no other word that's better than stupid kankan?

Monday 22 March 2010

Friday 19 March 2010

R.E.S.P.E.C.T
I NEED THAT WOMAN!
so, anyone who think tht she is the one, please take a note .
ok?
maybe we're at the same age, but please,
don't be such a fucking annoying person who used to be so-called CUTE
i am annoyed.
and i hate it.
fyi, nt just me.
clear enough i guess

Tuesday 16 March 2010

sspian,

sorry, we didn't make it to kelantan.
:((

Wednesday 10 March 2010

packed!

06.03.10
cheerleading
09-11.03.10
examination
11-15.03.10
zon tengah
13-14.03.10
cik achid's wedding


whoah. gilaa pnat ohh. luckily cheer dh habis n exam tggl esk ja. and akan bertolak ke integomb esk gak. dhla kurang practise since kak aina kena gi kem kp kt stf since 06-10.03.10. tht day ada friendly ngn um and integomb. gila horror ohh.
ini grouping ssp,

integomb
semashur
seseri
mtd
smss
ssp


hope that i can do the best! yeahh!